There's a holiday door decorating contest at work and while I am not decorating my door (because I do not have a homeroom), I did entertain the thought of taping an empty box of these to my door for festive purposes. However, the literary nerd in me decided that the best way to properly express my feelings for Little Debbie Christmas Tree Cakes would be to write a poem instead. Obviously.
|(photo credit: Frankie's Apartment)|
"Ode to Little Debbie Christmas Tree Cakes"
Your cellophane wrapper is a window through which
I can view pure delight.
The crinkle of opening it merely adds
to the existing anticipation.
Upon freeing you from this transparent home,
I too am free to enjoy my annual holiday vice
(besides watching A Christmas Story for 24 hours straight).
Creamy white icing nestled
between layers of moist yellow cake,
Frosty sugar icing like new fallen snow
and bright red adornments of radiant garland,
Shiny green crystals accenting
your surface like glowing twinkle lights.
Your exorbitant calories
are melted away by your explosive taste!
You may be two chemicals away from being plastic,
but that trivial fact is forgotten
once I feel the juxtaposition of your textural elements
in my pleasantly satisfied mouth.
Just one at first, then two.
What's one more?
And then it's four.
With a glass of skim milk
I surrender to indulgence.
Yes, Little Debbie Christmas Tree Cakes,
You are one of the reasons that this might be
the "most wonderful time of the year."